A Mindful New Year's Eve

New Year's Eve got a lot better a number of years ago when I took advice from Mrs. Sharp.  That's the Victorian super-mom in Sarah Ban Breathnach's first book, "Mrs. Sharp's Traditions: Nostalgic Suggestions for Re-Creating the Future Celebrations and Seasonal Pastimes of the Victorian Home."  It's one of my favorite books, as I am nothing if not seasonal.


Her suggestions for a Good Riddance party is the foundation for our mindful New Year's Eve.  I re-read my journal for the year ... often a kind of horrifying experience. As I go, I keep notes on what I'm glad is over.  I also find all kinds of good ideas and insights that I'd forgotten, so it's good to know that I was that smart in April. 

Then we write it all down, put it in one of the remaining ashtrays from our previous incarnation as smokers, and set the notes on fire.  Good Riddance.

Then comes the time for thanksgiving.  My daughter, my son ... they've had pretty good years. Our ministries got kicked up a step.  My husband survived a heart attack and is now healthier than ever. I write a letter to God ... a prayer ... that I keep in a Bible.  Reading the old ones helps bring needed perspective ... and sets the stage for writing the new one. 

This is followed by a great feast of rosemary olives, good cheese and crackers, Really Good potato chips, vegetarian Sloppy Joes, carrot slaw, cookies, chocolate-covered strawberries and a mocktail. Then we watch a good movie.  I try not to do "Sleepless in Seattle" every time, but I love Nora Ephron movies.

In the last few years, we've got to the Night Watch at church ... a tradition coming out of the African-American churches ... and we sing and pray to welcome in the new year. 

"The Mindfulness Solution"

So you want to be more mindful?  How?

Mindfulness has been listed as one of the top trends predicted for 2014.  The restless and relentless pace of high-tech life and a craving for Spirit-based peace are driving this.  One of the must-reads on the path to Christian mindfulness is a book by Ronald D. Siegel, an assistant clinical professor of psychology at Harvard. 

"The Mindfulness Solution:  Everyday Practices for Everyday Problems"  starts out with a chapter titled "Life Is Difficult" and ends with a mindful approach to facing aging and death.  You can't be much more comprehensive than that.  It's really helpful with lots of ideas for formal and informal practices specific to building a mindful life, dealing with specific concerns (worry, depression, pain, etc.) and resources. You can see many of these practices at www.mindfulness-solution.com

It's not a Christian approach, but many of the techniques are so helpful that they can be adapted to inviting God into the mindfulness easily.  His work is also linked to positive psychology as you can see here.   This is the year to let go and let God by being mindful.  This book helped me.

The Year Begins ... Again

One of the principles of Christian mindfulness is to keep starting over and over and over.

So I have decided to start my year over again ... today, as it is a birthday. I actually have been practicing mindfulness regularly for several months now.  But I think I can begin to write about what it's like.

Today, for example, the best part of the day was the drive to work.  The trees were so beautiful ... orange and red in the same trees,  dark red in the Bradford pears.  It was the painting of God, who had the amazing idea to give all these leaves their color and cover it up with green in the summer. 

I also was encouraged to begin ... again ... the practice of listening with two ears to conversations ... listening to the person, listening to the Spirit to see how I can respond more lovingly.  It's a great practice.

Hitting the Reset Button, Part Deux

Hi everyone! I've taken my break from blogging to do a variety of things:  support my husband in his cardiac rehab, pack his vegetarian lunch every day until he got the hang of it, cook his vegetarian dinner every night until he got the hang of it, cry in front of clostered nuns. But I've been mindful!  So I am going to resume this journey.

One of the books that's helped me to put on a happy face during some tough times is "The Positive Dog" by Jon Gordon.  It's all about a dog in a kennel who has the right to be miserable, is miserable and scares off potential owners because of it.  One of the other dogs in the kennel promised God that if he lived through a house fire, we would be positive and happy.  Here's some of the things I got from the book:

• Positive people live longer.  One study of nuns found that the cheerful nuns lived 10 years longer than the grumpy nuns. 
• Marriages are most likely to succeed when the couple has a 5-to-1 ratio of positive to negative interactions. 

Jon's best tips really are related to mindfulness.

• Smile.  A real smile produces serotonin in the brain.
• Laugh.  My rule is:  If I haven't laughed hard by 9 p.m., I watch or read something funny.
• Choose to feel "blessed" rather than "stressed." Think of three things you are grateful for whenever you feel stressed. 
• Adopt the No Complaining rule. No complaining until you have two possible solutions to the problem.
• Focus on the present moment. My tip:  If you get really upset or anxious, do a walking meditation ... walk around and focus on the feel of your feet on the ground and your lower legs moving through space.  Or do a nature meditation ... go outside and focus on what you see and hear around you, praising God for each individual thing you notice.
• Look for opportunity in challenges. Life is hard. What can you learn from this?
• Practice peace and kindness.  Be the change you want to see in the world, as Gandhi famously said. Be nice. Encourage others. 
• Pray and meditate on Scripture. This reduces stress, boosts positivity, and enhances health, vitality and longevity.
• Choose faith instead of fear. All negativity is rooted in fear.  Fear believes in a negative future. Faith believes that your ultimate future will be good. 

The Day We Pushed the Reset Button

Life as we have lived it:  Two hard-charging, high-pressure jobs.  Beloved adult children with serious illnesses. Community service on hands-on boards. Church ministry to hurting people. Participation in two or three small groups. Elderly mothers. Feisty cats.

The day we pushed the reset button came because we both had a medical moment.  A heart attack, followed by a return trip to the hospital for "too much, too soon."  An attack of hives that nearly turned deadly and had no real cause other than "stress."

"You've tried changing jobs," the doctor said. "So let's try something else."

My something-else is Christian mindfulness.  It's a way of living in the moment with the practice of the presence of God.  As a classic overachiever, I've always done prayer in a big, scheduled way.  Centering prayer.  Liturgy of the Hours. And so on. I've read and re-read Brother Lawrence's "Practice of the Presence of God."  So now I get to live it.  For at least one year, my sole focus will be on Christian mindfulness.  Let's see how this goes.